Sara Antonio - Actress
Sara Antonio is an actress that took a leap of faith and pursued her dream of becoming an actress at the age of 29. She's been in several movies, commercials, and popular shows including Will Trent and Another Version of You. This interview is packed with incredible stories about her journey from leaving a career to pursue acting while also being a wife and mom, what it requires to prepare to be on scene, and how to navigate life as an actress. Enjoy!
Brian: Well, hello, my name is Brian Harbin. Welcome to today's episode of the grit.org podcast!
We have my wife, Jen, with us today. Welcome, Jen!
Jen: Hello!
Brian: And we have Sarah Antonio.
Sara: Hello!
Brian: And a little bit about Sarah Antonio. So she is currently a guest star recurring as Gina Ormwood on ABC's Will Trent, and as Gina, Sarah's the wife of lead Atlanta detective Michael Ormwood, and the show was recently renewed for season 5. She starred in the faith-based drama The Reason and also in Another Version of You, a romance adventure film shot in Iceland, France, and Tennessee.
She's acted in films such as Hallmark's Christmas at Graceland, Lifetime's Night Nurse and Locked In, Hot Summer Nights, and Everyday Yeti, and in television appearances on A Friend of the Family, Dynasty, Watchmen, The Righteous Gemstones, The Resident, Nashville, House of Cards, The Inspectors miniseries, AHA. She can currently be seen as the woman in Litter-Robot commercials.
Sara: I forgot about that.
Brian: Other commercial work includes national campaigns for GEICO, DIRECTV, Zaxby's, Valvoline, Kirkland's, and Cox Communications and others. Has a background in theater, including Rachel Brown in Inherit the Wind and Fahrenheit 451. She's a graduate of University of Virginia and has a master's degree in communications from University of Florida. From Fort Myers, Florida as well. And we had the pleasure of having Sarah come and speak to the kids and counselors last summer at Grit Camp. She did a phenomenal job, and we have that on video too.
So welcome, Sarah!
Sara: Thank you! Thank you for having me!
I loved speaking with Grit Camp. You know, I'm a big fan of what you guys are doing there, and I've told so many friends, if you really want to figure out what you know about something, challenge yourself to go speak to a group of 7 to 17-year-olds, and it will force you to refine your knowledge into like a tight 10-minute entertaining conversation. And that was just such a treat for me. I loved it, and they were great. They asked a lot of great questions too.
Brian: Yes, that was a lot of fun to have you come in for that. And I wanted to give a shout out too to escrow.com, our sponsor, for buying anything safe and secure online and SarahAntonio.com, you can check out that as well.
Sara: Thank you!
Brian: And so we always like to start at, you know, kind of early life. I knew you grew up in Fort Myers, Florida, but any particular principles you feel like were instilled at a young age or any particular habits or character qualities you felt like you formed early on have been impactful for you?
Sara: Well, I do have a confession. It's that I'm a firstborn daughter. So if you know anything about us firstborn daughters, we're really responsible. We get things done. We're problem solvers. And I think we carry a lot of other people's challenges with us too. So I think that you were firstborn. I knew it. Oh, I knew it. I almost asked, but right.
So you know that that's probably a big part of like who we are. And I think that that's a big part of why I am where I am today of just kind of like, let's get it done. Let's roll up our sleeves. And I asked my… I'm really close with my parents and my brother too. And I asked my dad leading up to this, I said, "Well, how would you have described me as a kid?" He said, "Well, you were very goal-oriented and you were very focused on your education." And he gave the example, when I was 4, I wanted to be a tightrope walker and I would balance on the banister. I mean, this is not a real ambition. I balanced on the banister of my parents' bed.
Brian: Yes.
Sara: And I thought, "Okay, I'm going to go pro." And apparently I asked him at 4 years old, "Dad, to be a tightrope walker, do I need to go to graduate school?" And without skipping a beat, he was like, "Yes, definitely, 100%." So I was like, "Okay, writing that one down."
Jen: Smart dad.
Sara: So yeah, that was just an emphasis on my family on higher education. And I think that that carried through.
Jen: That's amazing! Well, I mean, I can tell that you're goal-oriented. And, you know, when you were talking about speaking to the kids at Grit Camp, you did such a phenomenal job of holding their attention.
Sara: Oh, thank you!
Jen: And, you know, that's not always the case with 7 to 10-year-olds. And you explained, acting in a way that could relate to every kid there. They saw it as a sport, and you would explain it as an endurance sport. We'll get more into that later, but—
Sara: Yeah, we talked about the goats.
Jen: The goats, you did. The 10,000 hours, and they can all relate to that.
Brian: Yeah.
Jen: And so I would love to know, okay, so you were very goal-oriented as a child, tightrope walking. And then how about as you got to your older years? I'm sure that you were still just as driven. You went to UVA. So what about as a teenager? Any stories there that kind of formed you or any memorable moments as you kind of battled?
Sara: Yes, and I've never shared this publicly, so this is feeling a little vulnerable, but this was a formative experience as a teenager that really, I took a couple things from it. So when I was a kid, I wanted a car, right? So I wanted to save up my money and I was 10 years old and couldn't work outside of the home. So I started a dog poop scooping business, in which my parents were really my only customers. So dog poop scooping, cleaned the pool, and then when I got about 12, I started babysitting. So I saved up all my money, and I helped buy my first car. I was really proud of this car. And as 16-year-olds are wont to do, I got into a touch of a fender bender.
Jen: Just a small one.
Sara: Just a baby one.
Jen: Just a minor.
Sara: In which I rear-ended the person in front of me. And luckily, the other driver was okay, I was okay, my passenger was okay. What was not okay was how I handled it. My passenger was my then 16-year-old boyfriend, and 2 16-year-olds in a car, I mean, it's— we're not making all the best decisions. So instead of— Recipe for success. Yeah, recipe for disaster. Instead of calling my parents and letting them know what had happened, I gave the other driver my 16-year-old boyfriend's phone number and felt like that had been handled.
Jen: Done.
Sara: No problem. Nothing else to think about.
Brian: No problem solving, insurance, registration, none of that.
Jen: No, nothing.
Sara: Pretty sure it was fine. And he was like, "I got this, babe." And I was like, "Great, I will not think about it again." I forgot about my problem, right? That's the story. I threw it away. I did not deal with my problem. Felt like someone else will take care of this. Spoiler alert, he did not. His plan was to hang up on the woman when she called.
Brian: Oh no.
Sara: Yes. No, no. So, oh no.
Jen: Yet again, problem solved.
Sara: I'm like, la la la, I don't know about that. He's like, "Problem solved." So I'm blissfully ignorant thinking everything's fine until I come home from school one day. And you know this, when your parents say, "Is there anything you wanna tell us?"
Jen: Ooh, pit in your stomach.
Brian: The open-ended question.
Sara: The open-ended question. And I'm like, no, no, no. Can't think of anything. And instead they just played the voice message that this woman had left for them. Oh, she hunted me down.
Jen: Oh.
Sara: Yes, she did. So, played the voice message, and, you know, my heart drops. And my parents, to their, you know, testament to them, my dad had me go to my room, all the extra money that I had saved up, the total for her bill was $500. I brought surely what looked like a drug dealer's bag of Ziplocked ones and fives and some quarters, all my leftover babysitting money. Stacked. He drove me to her office parking lot. She met me in the parking lot. I had to look her in the eye, apologize, and hand over my sad Ziploc. And I remember it, right? And it was important from really two sides. One was that I had accountability.
Jen: Yes.
Sara: Right? Ooh, so hard. Especially, I think, for children of privilege, I think it's easy to like, "Let me take care of this for you, baby. Let me take care of this for you."
Jen: Right.
Sara: And my parents really could have just been like, "Oh, we're so embarrassed. Let me write this woman a check." But I had to go down and face the music myself. I had to deal with my problem. And then the second side of it was that I knew my parents would always be there for me. Right? They're not going to clean up my mess, but they will help me. So he was there with me. He stood there with me through— oof, so I can feel it. You know, that embarrassing moment, but like responsibility and accountability. And then knowing that my parents were always there for me.
Jen: Wow!
Sara: Yeah.
Brian: And having to face that as well adds a whole other element. It's not like they talked to her on the phone. It's like, no, no, we're going to go see her in person.
Sara: Yeah, it made an impression.
Brian: Yeah.
Jen: That probably shapes you as a mom. Oh, for sure. I know your son, you do that with him a lot. Thank you! And I, you know, I mean, not that you—
Sara: I've told them that story.
Jen: Yes. I mean, that he takes responsibility. He's the type of, we've gotten to know him, and he takes responsibility in situations and has that same sense of doing the right thing. So you've instilled that in him and your precious girl too.
Brian: Yeah, and I can relate too. I have an older sister that is very much all those same qualities as well, and so I can appreciate it too. Yeah, I was the younger brother that could never quite live up to the same school standards and educational. But, and speaking of which too, so in Fort Myers, Florida, you make the decision to go to UVA. So what kind of led to that decision, and any idea on career, you know, at this point?
Sara: Have you been to Charlotte?
Brian: I have not actually.
Sara: It is so beautiful. I mean, you just show up on campus and it is like the Disneyland for 18-year-olds. It's just gorgeous. It's designed by Thomas Jefferson. The grounds are stunning. You show there and it's like the Disney movie of college. It was a dream. So I knew I wanted to go there.
Brian: That was your first choice? Didn't look at really any other ones?
Sara: I also looked at Chapel Hill. Chapel Hill. And truthfully, I also applied to Chapel Hill and was waitlisted there. So I was kind of, my heart was like torn between the two and it was like, "Okay, God's telling me where the answer is."
Jen: Mm-hmm.
Sara: And when I had applied, I was planning to go to the McIntire School of Commerce, which is really well known. It's a great business undergrad program that they had. I was like, "Okay, that's what I think my plan's going to be." And so I get there my very first semester. I take this class, Econ 101 with Kenneth Elzinga, who is like a— talk about GOATs, he is a legend. And I was like, "This, I want to be, and I want to study econ forever. This is amazing. It's the psychology of money. It's amazing." So then the next semester I take, I think American Government 101 with Larry Sabato, who's the head of the politics department. He's also a GOAT, a legend. And I was like, "That, I want to do that." So I double majored.
Jen: Wow!
Sara: In econ and American government, which really together kind of give you a good understanding of how the world works. Loved those courses, loved the program, loved University of Virginia. And I got about 2/3 of the way through and I was like, "Well, I don't want to be an economist. I don't want to go to law school. It's kind of what this path is leading towards." And so I was like, "What elements am I really drawn to?" And I really liked the public affairs side of government.
Jen: Okay.
Sara: The government classes, politics classes that I was taking. So I was like, "Well, I'm going to start." I got some internships in PR and communications, and then I applied and got into the University of Florida's grad program for communications. So I was like, "This is it, this is the thing." So I went and focused on— I got my master's in communications with a focus on public relations.
Brian: And did you go straight to Florida after UVA or?
Sara: I did. Well, I went straight. I took a summer in New York where I worked in event planning where we did 7-figure weddings and product launches and things like that. And the secret that I have to confess there is that I ate a lot of caviar off of the passed plates. I had never seen caviar before. I was like, "Where has this been all my life?" So one per event, I'd be like, "Just one, just one."
Jen: Just a little taste.
Sara: Yeah, yes. But it was a blast. Thank you guys for my internship. It was an unpaid internship, but I paid myself.
Brian: That million-dollar weddings kind of sets an unrealistic bar.
Sara: Oh my gosh!
Brian: No, it was amazing.
Jen: What a cool experience.
Sara: I mean, you know, we had proper— we had events in the Hamptons and it was a really nice, amuse-bouche, leading into my grad program. To the point that I remember, one of my sweet Virginia friends, sweet friends from Virginia, her mom, her grandma would ask, "Is Sarah getting her master's in party planning?" I was like, "I don't think they give masters in party planning," but it was a summer.
Yeah, so I did that because that was kind of like the buffer between the two. And then just jumped right in, into that communications program in Gainesville, which is great. I met my husband there. He was getting his master's in accounting, and we were introduced by a mutual friend. Loved the program, loved, I mean, I feel like I could have been one of those people who was like a career student.
Jen: Mm-hmm.
Sara: I just, it could be like 10 more PhDs, please. I love learning. I love being in the classroom setting. But we both decided, we were like, "Okay, we're ready. What are we going to do?" We decided, I condensed my classes so that we could move to Denver for just a fun adventure, new opportunities. And so I did all my classwork, condensed that, and then I wrote my thesis while we, after we moved to Denver.
Brian: Yep.
Sara: And you look back at what I wrote my thesis on, I was like, "Oh my gosh, it was about like social media, rise of social media. Like, it must be so dated right now." I would love to go back and read it, but it felt very like avant-garde at the time.
Jen: You could be a professor in that.
Sara: Oh, I mean, yeah, sign me up.
Jen: I mean, you could.
Sara: I think there's another life where I am a professor.
Jen: I think so too. I could see that.
Sara: Another season. Yes, I would love that. So finished the thesis, jumped right in to—
Brian: And by the way, in Denver, were you guys like just skiing or just living, or was he working too?
Sara: He was, yeah. He worked at a public accounting firm there.
Brian: Okay.
Sara: So he got a job there. So that's when you moved to a new city again? Yes, sorry, new city. We had good reasons. You know I'm too responsible to just like run. No, we had things lined up. We lived in the Cherry Creek area, neighborhood. It's so beautiful. We just love— Denver's a cool city.
Jen: But we did ski.
Sara: We skied like every weekend that you could ski. And so I got right into an advertising and PR agency there. Loved that. It's sort of like, I don't know, I would advise young people, whatever field you're in, if you have an opportunity to do an agency-type setting, and whether that's like if you're an attorney working at a law firm versus going in-house or whatever it is where you're going to kind of get a sampling, it's like tapas.
Yeah. You know, I had clients who were the Colorado Ballet and Coors Brewing Company. So it's like ballet and beer. You're kind of all over the board in a way that's like really helpful to learn about like, what do I like? What do I want? What am I drawn towards? I found that really cool.
Jen: Like rotations in medical school?
Sara: Yeah, exactly, rotations in medical school, exactly.
Jen: Yeah, like getting a taste of it in real life.
Sara: A taste of it, yeah, a little sampler. Nice, a little sampler. Yeah, so loved that experience, had great clients that I got to work with. We decided to make— Dan's family had some health issues. We decided to move to Jacksonville for a season, and we were here. I worked at another advertising and PR agency here, great clients, focused more on business-to-business, which is where, you know, you're working with clients that are marketing to other businesses, which is a totally different brain set. And I loved, loved that. There's a transportation focus in Jacksonville, so I feel like I learned a lot about the rail industry. Really cool! All in this season, I keep getting promoted. I'm doing really well. And then God is like, "You should take an acting class."
Jen: Wow!
Sara: I was like, "Well, no, I'm wearing my little skirt suits and I'm doing media training. That's not what I'm doing." And he's like, "No, you should take an acting class." And I was like, "Well, I'm in Jacksonville, Florida. Where is there going to be an acting class?" And this was, you know, a while ago. I got on the Google and found Cindy Hogan, who is a wonderful actress, happened to be living in Jacksonville during that season. And ran an on-camera acting class that I jumped right into. I was like, "Okay, I'm going to try this." And I was so— you know when your heart is trying to protect you from admitting the thing that you want? So I show up on the first day of class in my little skirt suit, and I was like, "Well, I'm here so that I can be better at presenting to clients. I'm here because of my job. I'm here because it's going to help me be a better public relations practitioner."
Jen: Mm-hmm.
Sara: Which wasn't true. My heart just couldn't admit what I longed for. And so I got into it and was taking the classes, and I was like, "Oh, no, this is the thing. This is the thing."
Jen: Mm-hmm.
Sara: I started going to— because I went to University of Virginia, which really has a great theater program, but I never took theater classes there. I never took theater in high school. I was bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. So while I was working at the agency in town, I went back to night school at the local community college and studied theater from scratch.
Brian: Okay.
Sara: Studied acting from scratch as if I'd never taken anything, all the Tennessee Williams, everything, all the things you need to do. And through that process, I was like, "Ooh, yeah." Started doing theater at Theater Jacksonville, which is great. I love Theater Jacksonville. At Five and Dime Theater, which is wonderful. I'm really proud of everything that they've been able to do.
And as that's going on and kind of getting more and more, but still, you know, juggling 60 hours at the agency and going, I think this is a thing that I want. And that voice just kept coming back and I think this is a thing that I really want. Until finally I got a local agent and I looked her up. She's still here. First Coast Talent. They were so sweet. I had no credits. I had done nothing except for theater. And she took me on a million years ago and I started booking some things. I started auditioning for some things. And more and more, it was like, "If I really want to give this a go."
So I started booking some things, started getting some things. And my husband and I talk about it, we pray about it. And I put in my notice to quit the agency, which I think that they were really surprised. I think people probably thought I was having a quarter-life crisis. "What are you doing? You're 28 years old. How are you going to do this?"
Jen: And you're doing so well.
Sara: And you're doing so well. You're being promoted.
Jen: You're so successful in this job already.
Sara: What makes sense? It didn't make sense.
Jen: Right.
Sara: From the outside. And now, sweetly, people who look back are like, "Of course, that was perfect. Of course you made that choice." But at the time, it felt wild. I think that there's something really powerful about blowing up your life when it's going well. Do you know what I mean? When you're like, this is really good, but it could be better. It could be— there could be something more. And that's harder. I think when you have things cleared out of the way, maybe it's easier to be like, "Well, let's just throw spaghetti and see what happens." But this was like, I'm going to totally change everything and I hope it works. And if it doesn't, I would rather have made that try than get to the end and go like, "What if?" How sad would that be?
Brian: And not regret at least going for it. And I'm curious too, so at 28, you kind of it kind of bubbles up on you of like, "Okay, this is what I want to do." Do you feel like there's any indication before that, like what kind of planted that seed? Like, were you always into movies or certain, you know, actors that you really liked? And what do you feel like really kind of finally, you know, helped you kind of come to that conclusion that like, "Okay, this is actually what I really want to pursue?"
Sara: Well, my mom's a stage actress, so I had grown up going to the theater. So I always had appreciation for the arts, but it was always like, "That's for them. I'm in my business lady lane."
Brian: Mm-hmm.
Sara: So I think it was just a matter of opening my heart up to what God was offering me. It was like, this was a God-driven dream. And to hear that and to really respond to that was, I don't know, I'm glad that I was able to listen. 'Cause I think that that's exactly what it was, was a God-driven dream to go kind of pursue this.
And I think there was enough like validation from other people, like, "You're good. What you're doing is worthwhile." And enough feedback. I'm like, I think I can actually give this a go. And if I don't, then I'm always going to wonder about it. So I put in my notice, right? I'm 28 years old. I put in my notice. Crazy! And within a couple weeks, it was one of those things where you just kind of get the, "Yep, that was the right choice." I get a call from my former associate who's like, "Hey, I've started up my own agency. Will you be my freelancer?"
And at the same time, my husband gets offered a job in Nashville, like within 2 weeks, I think, after I'd put in my notice. And we were like, Nashville at the time was not the Nashville it is today. It was very much a music city. Now I think it's really known as like an entertainment mecca for the Southeast. But I was like, "I think we just got to go for this."
So we moved to Nashville feeling like that's going to be a really good creative environment for me. And then his job was a really good fit for him. So we both felt very excited about that. Nashville, I love it. It's such a great city. It has grown so vibrantly. The Nashville then was a very sweet, sweet town, and it's stronger and bigger now. I just, I love it. I feel like I grew with the city. And at the same time, Atlanta was just exploding. Georgia's tax incentives is what drew production to the state.
Jen: Exactly.
Sara: And unfortunately, Florida at the same time was cutting their tax incentives. So everything was then going— if you could shoot it to look like Florida, you could shoot it in Georgia on the coast. So everything was going to Georgia, which really made Atlanta just blow up the way it is today. I'm so proud of that city. I'm so proud of everything that everyone has done to keep the incentives going there. It's a great film hub. And as a Southeast actor, those are my, you know, these are my cities— Atlanta and Nashville and Florida too. And then North Carolina and South Carolina, I try and work wherever I can. But I'm proud of what we're doing.
Brian: Yeah, and it really opens up where you don't have to be on the West Coast to be, you know, on TV and in movies, right?
Sara: That's exactly right.
Brian: Atlanta, which was a change, comes more competition, I'm guessing, with for sure.
Sara: For sure. But I think that, exactly what you said, it used to be, and I think even now people will be like, "You don't live in Los Angeles." And I go to work in Los Angeles. I'll go out and visit. I'll take meetings. I got to go check out the Will Trent writers' room there, which was so fun. It was exactly what you would imagine, like the writers' room out of like a movie set to look like. I was like, "There's the little rubber band ball on the desk, Post-it notes everywhere."
Jen: Nice!
Sara: Right. So I'll go out for that and then still keep a hub, my hubs being Atlanta, Nashville, and Florida. It didn't used to be that way. I think people thought you had to go to Los Angeles or New York, and there's just so much great content coming out of the Southeast that you can be based here. And the actors here are wonderful. They're collaborative, they're encouraging in a way that we want to lift all boats, you know, want everyone to do really well. And I think that that's just such a specific nature to like our Southeast actor community. We really encourage each other and lift each other up. One of the—
Jen: I love you sharing how that was another, you know, God was speaking to your heart and you were listening.
Sara: Oh yeah.
Jen: And that leap of faith that you took, because it was like that fear in your face of like, I'm off the cliff, here we go, let's do it. And then when you moved again, now I'm going to a new city to try this out. And one of the things that I loved that you talked to the kids about was that you kind of described it as like an endurance sport. And when you talked about the iceberg, that the top of the iceberg is what you see, and, you know, that's the 10% is what you see is the final product of a TV show or a movie.
Sara: Yeah.
Jen: And you don't see all of the other stuff that goes underneath. Everyone else that is involved in the productions, all of every person on set that does things that kids don't even realize that they do. All that goes into it. And you talked about all the GOATs putting in 10,000 hours in whatever their field is, like whatever their arena is of expertise. Can you talk to us a little bit about that?
Sara: Yes, yes.
Jen: As you're starting this journey with your, you know, in Nashville, just all that.
Sara: We talked, exactly, about the 10,000 hours with the kid, Malcolm Gladwell. And I think that's such a great thing for all of us to think about. And then we used the iceberg as the metaphor, right? You can see the top 10% of the iceberg, 90% is under the water. Most of the kids were familiar with that. And I was like, "That top 10% is the red carpet and the hair and the makeup and the on-set selfie, all the glitz and the glam and the things that people see." And then that 90% is really where most of the 10,000 hours are, I think.
Jen: Yeah.
Sara: I mean, that's the grind. That's the reading and studying and learning and growing and doing student films where you're not getting paid any money, but you're building your reel. You're building a reel so that you can then get a bigger agent, and that bigger agent's going to get you a one-line co-star, and then that one-line co-star is going to lead to— So it's very much like just putting in the work day by day. What today am I doing to add to those 10,000 hours? And with acting, there's very much this idea of overnight successes that people have. I don't know if that's ever really happened. I think people just don't see those 10,000 hours. They don't see the things that people were doing.
So I moved to Nashville and I did a bunch of student films and I did little commercials. I had a new agent there, started growing what I was doing. The one-liners started turning into like a 5-liner co-star, and then those build and those build. My very first network TV show was Nashville on ABC in Nashville, right? And I very meta played like a production assistant for Hayden Panettiere in the show that she was filming, right? Very meta. And all those experiences, right? You go on to the next and then you start booking bigger roles, and then you start booking the guest stars and start getting lead, smaller roles in films and bigger roles in films and leads in films until you're really working on recurring characters and series regulars, that type of thing.
Brian: Mm-hmm.
Sara: So it's kind of like just moving it forward, moving it forward. And I think everyone sees the end result and the shiny stuff, but all of it was there all along. I come from a background, I had some great acting coaches here in Jacksonville, in Nashville, in Atlanta. 2 in Atlanta that I've studied with for years is Caroline Le Currier and William Arnold. And they both kind of are from a scene study script analysis background.
So that's the heart for me, is the idea that it's there on the paper, it's there in the story, the writer has given you most of what you need. Walter Goggins recently talked about how he reads a script 200 times, which is a lot, right? But the idea that every time you read it, you're getting more, you're getting more, you're getting more, you're getting more, you're getting more.
And so for me, script analysis is really important. It's breaking down whether you're getting the 120-page feature script or you're just getting the 5 pages for an audition. What can I pull from that? Making choices for the character. What are their goals? What are their obstacles? What tactics are they using? What are they really saying? That's why I talk to the kids about like if I ask you da da da da.
Jen: Yes.
Sara: Is that really what I'm saying? Am I really just going to Costco parking lot? Am I really? Exactly.
Jen: All this you talked about the subtext.
Sara: The subtext. Yes. And so like I think that that's the preparation. I think you do all of that preparation so that when you get to set, you can let it go. Right? So that's part of the 10,000 hours is, yeah, you're on set for a week, but you spent X amount of time before that building up to it and doing all the work and doing the preparation so that it feels really natural.
The other things I wanted to mention on that, that for me, I think really are important, are the muscles to build, which is imagination. I think we're all born with these amazing imaginations, and it's work to keep that active and strong and to keep engaged.
And then the other side that I think is really the heart of acting is empathy. And I think that that's a muscle too. And then there's really kind of two sides of that. Like, as actors, we're charged to be empathetic to the characters that we're portraying. You are the only person who's watching out for that character, right?
Jen: Mm-hmm.
Sara: Like, the writer has a whole script to worry about. The director has a whole film to worry about. The gaffer's worried about his project. You know, everyone's worried about what they're doing. Your job is to focus on protecting that character. And why are they making the choices that they're making? And to remember that nobody thinks they're a villain in real life, you know? So your character doesn't think they're a villain if they are.
Jen: Yes.
Brian: Yes.
Sara: So why are they making the choices that they're making? So have empathy towards them. And then also, I think that we have a responsibility as artists, as actors, as filmmakers to build and foster empathy in the work that we're doing. I think that a film and television, such a powerful medium to create empathy with its viewers. And so that also has twofolds to it. I think we have a chance to make opportunities for windows and mirrors, right?
Jen: Mm-hmm.
Sara: So if I— if we work on a project and we can create opportunities for windows where people can see worlds and lives unlike what they're living, and then mirrors where they can see people and lives who reflect themselves. I think both are really important.
Brian: Absolutely. And, you know, it's funny because this is right on point with what you're saying too. I remember a college buddy of mine had moved to California, pursued acting, and he said that anybody that you see on TV or in any role, they've actually been doing it for at least a decade. You know, to your point of putting in the time to even get that first initial role. And you were talking about too, even, you know, if it's just a couple lines, it's about understanding the whole script to understand, okay, well, how does this particular line, which is very important, otherwise it wouldn't be in there.
Sara: Yeah.
Brian: How does it fit into this overarching— it's not just that one scene, it's kind of thinking about all the things encompassing it. And I wanted to ask too, you know, what was for you kind of that first gig? I don't know if it was the Nashville gig, but was it that first gig where you felt like kind of gave you that, you know, encouragement, like validation, like, okay, this is starting to work. Kind of that first moment where it's like, oh my gosh, this is it, you know.
Sara: This is great because I— my very first paid acting gig, we went around. I was with some friends in Nashville not too long ago where we each shared our first paid on-camera acting. And it was all variations of, you know, the same. For me, it was an industrial, which is basically just a corporate training video. And I used to do a ton of those. They paid well. I had like a very non-regional voice. I had a reporter voice, so I could tell you how to use your washing machine. I could, if you had some training that you needed to do before you went out into the sales force, I was your gal. I used to do a ton of them. But my very first one, I was a patient for, I want to say, an eye drop company. And I'm in a faux doctor's office with a faux doctor. And I'm like, "But doctor, how much does it cost?" Right? It wasn't great, but I made money. And I was like, "I'm rich. I've made it." It was like success. It was the feeling of, "I've made the right choice. Someone believes in me. I can go to work and do this. This is a job. This is a career."
Brian: Mm-hmm.
Sara: And I was just like, so I was pleased as pie with myself and I loved it. Cut to we're all sharing our stories, right? And we're, it's all variations. Mine was the industrial for the eye drops company. Another friend was like a local mattress commercial. Another friend was like a local car dealership commercial, whatever it was. We get to Ted Welch. Ted Welch, if you're listening, you know what I'm about to say. We get to my friend Ted Welch, and these are all actors who have had successes now.
So it's fun to throw back to our original jobs. And we get to Ted Welch, we're like, "Okay, first paid acting on-camera gig." And he goes, "The Help." And we were like, I was like, "What?" He's like, "The Help." I was like, "The Academy Award-winning film?" I was going to say, "The Help was your first paid acting gig?" And he's like, "Yeah." And I was like, "No, wait, no, it wasn't. I don't believe you." And I was like, "Who were you?" And he goes, "I was Bryce Dallas Howard's husband." I was like, "The h*** you were! Wait, wait, wait! What?" I made him pull it up right there. I made him pull it up, and sure as heck he was.
And we were like, "Ted, you don't know how to play this game. This is not how this game is played." Wrong. Just to say that most people don't do The Help as their first paid on-camera acting gig, but that just cracked me up. Everyone else had our pretty standard first experiences.
Jen: Ted was the outlier.
Sara: He was definitely the outlier. But yes.
Brian: And I think too, you're, and for those of us that don't really understand how the acting world works, I mean, you know, there's IMDb where actors put up, and then, you know, I think there's, you know, safe to say hundreds of thousands of, you know, people out there.
And so is the idea to book gigs to ideally get to like a on a show or recurring show or in a movie, or like, you know, what's kind of the progression that— or is it just really looking for that next best fit for what you're looking for, you know, time-wise and what the role is?
Sara: Yeah, and I think it's different for everyone, right? I mean, I think if you look on IMDb, you're gonna see IMDb Pro, you can see like rankings of actors. There's always gonna be like that top 500, and that's like every name that you no. So the Chris Pratts are on their own journey. I say for the rest of us, I think you have an agent that sees you and knows you, and they're going to be advocating for what is best for you. I have a great relationship with my agent now in Atlanta, and we've sat down and kind of mapped out, like, what does the next 5 years look like? What does this look like? What roles are we aiming for?
Brian: So having a plan.
Sara: Having a plan in place. We've done this level and we're not going back and we're looking forward. And what's a great fit in terms of what can I book, what should I book, what am I really good at, what type am I? And I think it's just having really good partners. And for people starting out, it's finding someone who's going to believe in you, who's going to nurture you.
And then when you're in maybe the middle of your career, it's finding someone who's like, "How do we take it to the next place in a way that's like a really good fit for you." So I feel very thankful that I'm with people who are that way right now.
Brian: Absolutely.
Sara: Yeah, it is.
Jen: What about when you, this brought me back to when you were talking to the kids about what a sort of marathon sport this is. You were describing being on set and you, you know, you hurry and wait and you're having to sort of reserve your energy 'Cause if you put all of it into the first scene, well, we didn't actually record that, so we have to redo it. And being able to like, not, just to sustain that level of energy. I think that kids can see how an athlete is able to, they have to, you know, they work so hard and then they get knocked down by an injury or fatigue.
Brian: Yeah.
Jen: Or someone in the business world is like going out there and trying to make sales and knocking on doors and stuff. Or not knocking on doors, but you know, trying to make deals happen left and right, getting no, and as an actor, you deal with a lot of rejection.
So early on, as you're building this stamina, how did you deal with that? How did you keep pressing on and keep that same work ethic that you obviously have when that's what's— I'm assuming, or is there anything else that kind of is knocking you down as an actor? Like with—
Sara: That's a great question. I, and also I like to think about, I think actors and artists have like a unique challenge in staying vulnerable in a world that kind of asks us to wear our walls for protection, right? And so there's that balance of like, how do I stay vulnerable and open and don't get my heart broken? You know?
Jen: Yes.
Sara: Yes. It's a mix of both, right? And I think we do a good job of that. What I've tried to say is my mantra is like, "What's meant for me is mine, right?" If I do the work, and we've talked about preparation, right? If I do all my preparation, if I put everything I can into an audition or whatever it is, I can't lose that because it's either mine or it isn't mine. It's either meant for me or it isn't. I can't take it away from somebody else because it was theirs. And I can't lose something because it wasn't meant for me. Do you know what I mean? So there's that idea of kind of very freeing thought. I'm going to have what I should have. And if it passes me by, then rejection is protection.
Jen: I love that! And that reminded me of something else that you said to the kids. And I'll never forget this. You said, "Well, when I was first starting out, I initially thought that my competition" Mm. "...is anyone who's about my height and has brown hair and is about my age going up." And you said— and I realized my competition is me. It's me versus myself.
Sara: 100%. 100%. And I think there's an idea of actors being competitive with each other, which, you know, knock on wood, luckily throughout the Southeast, I don't find that to be true. But I think in your mind, you can go, "Well, I'm auditioning against every other person brunette woman who looks kind of like me with green eyes, and they're going to pick someone that's kind of like me. That's my competition," when it's not. It's, am I doing the best work that I can do? Am I giving this my full attention? Am I preparing to my best abilities? And that's so freeing too.
Brian: Absolutely.
Sara: I just had a really nice consult chat with Erica Bream, who's a casting director in the Southeast. And, you know, we talked for an hour and just went over career stuff and kind of a chance to get to know each other a little bit better. And we talked about this thing, which I think is so good for actors to be reminded of, but maybe other people too, is that we get so focused maybe on like word perfect or I've got to do this in this way and that in that way and get to hold onto something really tight.
Jen: Mm-hmm.
Sara: In a way that kind of strangles it. So I think there's a freedom in letting it go, releasing control, and then magic can happen. And I found that the casting directors in the Southeast, I've got great relationships with most of the people here, they love actors. And I think I would tell actors to know that, that anyone who's going into casting generally likes actors, otherwise they wouldn't be staring at their faces all day long for hours. And that you are a puzzle piece that may fit into this very elaborate puzzle that they're working on. And maybe you go in a different puzzle, but they want you to be that puzzle piece. They are rooting for you to help solve this problem for them.
I think if you think about it like as in a collaborative way, they— we're all on the same team, we want to make this work. There's a freedom in that too. Yeah, they're in your corner. They're in your corner. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Brian: And even if you don't get the role you come in for, maybe there's another role because they like you.
Sara: You know, it's a very relationship-based industry.
Brian: One thing I really wanted you to share as well that you talked about when you came to speak at camp was when you started out early on, you put something on your screensaver on your phone. Can you share with us what you put out there?
Sara: Yes. I love that. Okay.
Brian: Talking about manifesting and—
Sara: Yes. Okay. So I had an acting coach, William Arnold from Fourth Wall Acting Studio, who challenged us to put our dreams and goals in the present tense.
Jen: Mm-hmm.
Sara: I was like, "Okay, that's a great idea." So I'm like, "I'm gonna take it a step further and I'm gonna make it my morning alarm." So when I wake up at 06:30, it doesn't just say alarm, it says the thing that I want. And so that's the very first thing that I'm seeing. There's a power to putting it in the present tense because instead of saying, I will be, it's I am, and I don't think that there's a magic in that. I don't think that there's like a hocus pocus. I think that there's something powerful in telling yourself, "God wants this for me. I want this for me. It has. It is going to happen. It just isn't accurate right now, but it will be." And it aligns your thoughts and your goals so that you are making choices that further you to get there. So for a year and a half, my alarm was, "I'm a recurring character on a wonderful TV show, recurring guest star on a wonderful TV show." And I told the kids, you know, I specified wonderful because I didn't wanna tell the universe I wanted any TV show. I wanted a wonderful TV show.
Jen: That's right.
Sara: And so I looked at that and I felt like my choices aligned to kind of further that, and make that happen.
Brian: The, and, you know, you set a, you know, what we call like a BHAG, a big hairy audacious goal, right?
Sara: Oh.
Brian: And then obviously there's a lot of things that come. Before that, I don't want to ask the question, okay, was there ever a point you thought of quitting? But even, you know, there's obviously the ups and downs. You mentioned, you know, kind of the ups of, you know, the eyedrop role that you get, kind of that validation. But then there's also moments that are those low valleys where, you know, did you hit some of those? And when you did, how did you kind of push through those?
Sara: I think that the last 6 years for the entertainment industry has just been wild. March 2020, every industry, things came to a screeching halt with COVID. And in an industry that relies on people, it just stopped. And then it kind of came back in these spurts and it was different and we had masking and everything was different. Auditions were different. People were trying to figure out what that looked like. And then we kind of got into a new normal.
And then there was the writer's strike and the SAG-AFTRA strike, which I'm a union member, so I'm very supportive of my union, but that stopped work for about a year as well. So kind of through that process I was going, is this still— What is this? Is this meant for me? Is this something I'm supposed to still be doing? I don't know. But it was kind of jolty. I booked projects throughout that whole time, but kind of like, what are we doing here?
Jen: Yeah.
Sara: And I just had to really reflect on that. Is this still something that I'm being called to? And I was like, "Yes, it is." And then the world opened back up again and I came back on Will Trent, which was great. And then since then I've been working a bunch on some other projects. I've got, I was just in Portugal for a film festival, which is great. And I worked on a project in Nashville a couple months ago that I'm really proud of. But to say like all these things, we're like, "Okay, yes, the world, yes, we're supposed to be doing these things." But I think that there's a moment where you have to kind of check in and go, "Is this still meant for me?"
Jen: Yeah.
Sara: Yeah.
Brian: And what's interesting now too, I think since 2020, a lot of really unique things have come from it. I mean, you look at— that's basically when Netflix took off. I think it was Tiger King, you know, that was like all the rage. But the— oh, 2020. I think what we've started to see is like all these different, you know, you've got Netflix, Hulu, all these different apps, but then they're really producing phenomenal quality TV shows and documentaries. And so I think there's, you know, more opportunities with great production that doesn't necessarily have to be, you know, a hit movie or commercials, right?
Sara: Are you familiar with verticals?
Brian: Yes. Yep.
Sara: Oh, okay. So this is like the new thing. I'm going to be working on my first vertical. And it's the idea that like, right, we watch screens horizontally, but they've realized people have short attention spans right now. So they're making microdramas that are vertical, so you can watch them on your phone.
And truthfully, in the past I had said no thank you because the content maybe leaned a little lowbrow. I wasn't so sure if I wanted to touch on that, and I was a union member and I felt like I'm not sure most of those were not union. So I had steered away from them. But right now it's honestly rising so fast that they now— there's a SAG contract for verticals. My agency just added a vertical department for actors who want to work specifically on verticals. And the content itself is getting better.
So I'm going to be working in May on a new comedy vertical that I'm very excited about. It's about the casting process and it should be hilarious. So just evolving, I think, kind of being prepared to pivot and evolve. My heart is always going to be in film and television, but here, these are new opportunities. And maybe especially for younger actors who might not have credits and might not be able to jump right into, you know, a network episodic. These verticals, they're booming.
Jen: Yeah, it just shows what a, like, student you are and a constant learner and how coachable you are. You're so adaptable to that environment.
Sara: Thank you! It's a very different style of acting.
Brian: Very versatile. Camera angles change. I mean, I'm definitely no expert. I've made a lot of videos on CapCut over the years, but once you go from landscape to vertical, it's— there's a lot less—
Sara: Or not oners, single shots. Yeah.
Brian: Right. You're really in it. And I notice a lot more in the shows that I watch in terms of, like how much close-up they do. It's crazy how close-up they do. So I think probably with the verticals, it's going to get way more, you know, character-focused. And, to your point too about the empathy, one of the things that I appreciate that I've seen in the evolution of movies and shows is portraying characters from— that are villains and then making them the antagonist, right? And I think helping kids, okay, like remember it was like The Karate Kid and Johnny was the bad guy, but then now—
Sara: The anti-hero.
Brian: We see it from Johnny's perspective. And so it's interesting to see how things have evolved. But, what about, I guess, is there a favorite story you have that kind of stands out of, you know, of all the scenes and shows and everything that you've been on? Any particular story that kind of stands out above others?
Sara: I thought about this, and I've got some really good stories. Some we'd have to go out and have some wine to tell. But, and I was like, do I tell about working with Dolly Parton, who's amazing? I did a whole story on my Instagram about working with her, a dream. Do I talk about do's and don'ts on set of things I've learned? Do I talk about some of the big celebrities that I've worked with? Or what stories do I want to tell? And I was like, "Oh, I know the one because it ties into what I actually feel like my secret mission is on set." Right?
So I go to set, and I'm like, "I'm doing the job that I am paid for. I'm doing the work, right? I'm doing— I'm the actor. I'm hitting my marks. I'm saying my lines. I'm loving that. I'm creating this character." And that fills my heart so much. I love doing that work. And also, I have a secret side quest, which is to just shine some light and love on people on set, right?
And so it doesn't always work that you get to do both. Sometimes you need to focus on what needs to be done, and maybe it's a really emotional scene and it's a really emotional day, and you've just got to focus on— taking care of yourself. But if there's room and freedom for that, I say a prayer before I go to set every day. I'm like, "Dear God, make me a vehicle of light and love today." And that's it. And like, sometimes I'll get guidance of like, "This person needs it." Or it's a matter of telling the makeup artist, "Thank you so much. You do such beautiful work. I feel great because of you." Or same thing for wardrobe or loudly complimenting the PA in front of the second AD in just ways that are helpful. And not, you know, too much, but I try to do that.
So I did my— I went to work. I was working on this film. I'm really excited about this. I was working on this in December. It's about Harvey Brownstone, who is basically Canada's Oprah. He's so cool. And he's one of the executive producers on the film, so we got to spend some time hanging out. He told me— it's his whole life story. And so he told me all of it's real, and we told some more juicy stories about it. I loved working with him. That's so cool. And that I think that film is going to premiere at Toronto Film Festival this year.
So I'll let you guys know. So I'm it's in Nashville. I'm working on the film, and as you might know, there's kind of a very hurry up and wait atmosphere on sets, which is great. It's bursts of like, "Okay, hair and makeup, da da da da da," and then, "Wait right here." Okay, and then we're filming at the courthouse. So we're at, you know, we're at base camp getting the in the truck, go to the courthouse, wait, and then da da da da. And very much like chunks of speed and then resting time, and then, "Oh, hurry, we're going to do rehearsal." "No, no, okay, no, wait."
And so I saw I was working with an actor that I've known for years. He's an older actor, and I hadn't seen him in a long time. We did like the initial like hi hi hi hug hug hug da da da, and now we're sitting in the green room in our chairs waiting. As one does. And I go, you know, pull up my old staple. I'm gonna start doing a little scrolling on Instagram, whatever my algorithm has decided I like at the time. It's bad tattoos, I'm very ashamed to say. So I must look too long at these bad tattoos, 'cause it's like, "You want more?" I'm like, "Oh, I do, I do want more."
Jen: I don't, but I do.
Sara: I do. So I'm really getting ready to settle into some good bad tattoos, and God's like, "Ask him how he's doing." Okay. Put it down, and I was like, "Hey, have you been? What's new?" And he's like, "Well, we, just my wife and I moved to." And he tells me where they moved. I said, "Oh, we could have ended it there." Be like, "Huh, how about that? I'm gonna get back to my tattoos." And I said, "Why'd you move?" And he said, "Well, we moved to take care of my mother-in-law and father-in-law, and my mother-in-law just died 2 days ago." And it all came down, right? The whole wall came down. It all came down. I think I was the first person outside of immediate family who were in the thick of it with him that he could talk about this.
Jen: Mm-hmm.
Sara: So it was just this sort of emotional release. We talked for 30 minutes. He's tearing up, I'm tearing up, talking about the joy and pain of being a caregiver and loving on people at the end of life, and the pain of losing a loved one and the pain of seeing your loved one lose a loved one. And then funeral arrangements and elder care, just all of it. And it all came out. And there was this clarity that he'd been holding all this in and it just dumped out.
And so at the end, I could kind of say, "Wow, what a gift that you were able to give to— like, to— for you to be able to be those person— those people when they needed you." And that was the thing, you know, it was like, that's what— that's why I was there that day. I was there to do the work, right? But then it was also like, that was the secret mission.
Jen: You said the— you prayed to God before, "Use me as light." Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Sara: And it was like, he got it all out. And I think it was— he was able to do the work that he wanted to do without carrying this, like—
Jen: This burden.
Sara: Burden, yeah. It was cool.
Jen: You were right there with him.
Sara: It was magic. I was like, "Thanks, gosh, thank you, God."
Brian: You gotta go back to hair and makeup.
Sara: Yeah, 100%. A little fresh nut. We need a little fresh nut.
Brian: One thing I wanted to ask you too about is getting into character. I remember listening to one of the characters of Succession, and he was talking about— he's got an English accent, and he had talked about how he's in front of different people, and he kind of helps him figure out his tone and language and everything else. But for you, like, I know with Gina, Armwood on Well Trent, you're married to one of the cops, and I think y'all's marriage is kind of in disarray. And obviously there's a lot of factors there. How do you kind of get in that mindset of like, okay, this is, you know, the lens through which I'm looking at life and everything right now? Is there anything that you do, or do you feel like just kind of getting in the mode and getting in costume, all that kind of helps prepare you for that moment in that role?
Sara: I think for whatever character I'm working on, I do the prep in advance.
Jen: The screen analysis. Yep.
Sara: Exactly.
Jen: Your homework.
Sara: The homework. Perpetual student.
Jen: Yeah.
Sara: Perpetual student. Do all of that. And then the trick is to channel another eldest daughter, Elsa, and you just let it go. You have to show up on set and let it go and believe that it's all there. And I give a lot of credit to wardrobe. I think wardrobe does a great job. I think the art department does a great job of creating these worlds that you— if you're imagination-focused like I am, I don't use substitution. When you think of the method, I don't use substitution. I don't overlay my life experiences. I use imagination. So I'm really focused in…. They've created this beautiful world. The wardrobe is here. I did all of the prep work. I've thought about everything that this character is thinking about, and I'm just going to show up and be that person.
In the past, I've done some more specific things, and sometimes I'll pull from that. I played a— in the film Another Version of You, which is so good. You can go watch it. I love this film. I played a dozen different versions of the same character. So we filmed in Iceland and France and Nashville. And some days I'd be filming because we'd be in the same location, you'd have the same character. And so I'd be doing multiple characters myself in the same location. And so I was like, "How do I keep these guys straight?"
Jen: Oh yes, that would be confusing.
Brian: Yeah.
Sara: And so I came up with, you know, like my systems, they would have a color and a soundtrack and a perfume and then kind of try to categorize them that way. And so the music— and so I still use music and perfume, actually scent. These are like senses to get to like certain places. I think it's more helpful, it feels like, if a character is so different from me that I really have to think about it to get into the right place. But whoever she is, I try and do the work, let it go, and if I feel like I need to, I can use some music to get into the right headspace, especially if it's a really emotional scene. You know, when you're talking about losing your marriage, those things are— sometimes you need the right song to kind of get that feeling straight. And then I think perfume just sets the character.
Brian: Interesting.
Sara: Yeah.
Jen: Your olfactory senses are the strongest for me.
Sara: They really are.
Jen: And they bring you to a moment or a point. 100%. Yes.
Brian: And I love how what you said, because this applies, I think, to everything, is you trust the work that you've put in. So when you're in that role, you're trusting all the hours of, you know, reading script that you've put in. And, yeah, that's reassuring to hear. One fun question I wanted to ask too, in terms of, you know, when you see, famous actor, actress, anything to do or not say. Like, it's funny, Stone and I were at the Masters, a couple weeks ago, and Travis Kelce was there. He's like probably 6 feet away from us. He's got 5 people around him, and I was trying to tell Stone to go up and say hey to him or something. You know, there's no cell phones or anything, so you can't get pictures there. And he's got like 5 other like really big dudes around him, and my thought was to go up and say, "Hey, you need a couple extra bodyguards for the day," kind of thing. But like, offer your services.
Sara: He's like, "Dad, cringe."
Jen: Yeah, yeah.
Brian: I didn't want to embarrass him, but, you know, hey, we could have been hanging out with Travis Kelce for the day. But, anything that you would say, like, you know, do or don't say if somebody sees a famous actor out and about, or anything that from your perspective that you think they would appreciate hearing or not appreciate hearing? Or—
Sara: One of the highlights of, like, my professional career was in, I was at the Laugh Factory with some friends. And this female comedian did her whole set, and at the end she's like one minute, and she goes, "Will Trent," and points to me in the audience, and then did a whole bit on my character arc. Oh, like this girl, and da da da da da, and the audience was like dying.
Jen: That's incredible!
Sara: And I was like, "I'm gonna remember this." So that was a delight for me. I loved that, and I can't speak, you know, for other people. My friend Alan Powell, who's a filmmaker and an actor, he's got a great Instagram handle. Should check it out. He talks a lot about filmmaking. He just did a video about debunking the dos and don'ts.
Brian: Okay.
Sara: And he's a producer and an actor. He came from the perspective of, "Don't be afraid maybe to say hi and ask questions. We love talking about filmmaking. We love talking about industry stuff." And I think as long as people are respectful, yeah, go for it. If you see someone that you admire, go for it. Ask them a question. The worst they can do is say no, as long as you're being respectful and polite and kind of talking on— and this is really directed towards actors on set. Maybe if you were an extra on a set and you happen to be working with Chris Pratt or somebody that you really admire, do you say, "Hey, Chris, tell me more about the roles that you've booked?" Or you ask them questions. I don't think there's necessarily a wrong thing to do if the moment's right, it's appropriate and you're being respectful.
Jen: Along that line of too, if, as far as advice is, if you could give one piece of advice to your younger self when you were starting in this, what would it be?
Sara: You know, sometimes you hear something before you need it, and then when you're there, you're like, "Oh, there it is." In that moment. I worked with Louis Gossett Jr., who's— talk about GOATs.
Jen: Wow! He's amazing.
Sara: Yes. For people who aren't familiar, he was the first African American man to win a supporting Academy Award for Officer and a Gentleman. He worked on Roots. He's just had an incredible career. More recently, he was on Watchmen. He passed away, but I got to spend 6 months— or excuse me, 6 weeks with him in Augusta, Georgia. We worked on a faith-based film called The Reason, which is also really cool.
Jen: Yes.
Sara: And I was sort of his— I played his— I was a single mom, and he was a pastor, and he kind of took me under his wing. And I lived with him and his wife in this film. And so we had a lot of time together, which was great. And luckily, we had enough wherewithal, me and a couple of the other younger actors on set, to say, like, "Hey, Lou, what advice would you give us as younger actors?"
Jen: Yes.
Sara: And it's perfect because he said, "Okay, here's the thing. You go to set, you put everything you have into this character. You squeeze out your heart, your mind, all of it. You put all of yourself into this character for the entire film, for the entire shoot. And then when you're done, the day that you wrap, you pack yourself up and you take yourself with you. You do not leave your heart or your soul with a project because you'll get heartbroken."
Brian: Hmm.
Sara: And you have to have yourself for the next thing that you work on. So he would give examples of if you leave your heart and your soul with a film, and it doesn't get the accolades, it doesn't get the praise that you're expecting, now you're looking over your shoulder and thinking about that versus working on focusing on the next thing. And it was such great advice because I think that applies for so many things. Onto the next, right? We can't be like, we can't focus on how people are going to respond to our art especially, or if it's going to get the distribution or if it's going to get the marketing.
And so yeah, I had films that were like, the marketing budget wasn't there, so it didn't get the attention that I thought that it was going to get. You're like, "This is the thing that's going to blow up." And it didn't because it didn't have that. And you're like, "Okay, well, I've already moved on to the next, so my heart's not been broken by that." I think that's great advice. And I'm glad that I got it when I did because it served me well. And I try and tell other younger actors that too. Do the work, put everything that you have, and then take yourself with you.
Jen: That's wonderful because you can't control that.
Sara: You can't.
Jen: You can't. And when you take into your— I know we're getting close, so I just want to ask you one more thing. But you're taking yourself into the next thing. And for you, just because I know you, your children, I know, and you don't do anything like a little bit. You do, you give yourself 100% at everything you do. And I can see that in your relationship with your kids.
Sara: Oh, thank you!
Jen: Like when they're with you, they're so connected to you. You're clearly their safe place to just, you know, be. And so, I mean, how as a mom, and you know, especially so many working moms, moms that travel a lot. I know that they can wrestle with all the guilt, and even the moms that don't. Are we doing enough of this? You know, when we were growing up, it was just like, you know, are our kids fed and alive? And now it's like all the list of 50,000 things around them. Yes, Instagram, everything. Oh my gosh, right? And so, as a mom, how do you balance all that? Your role as a wife, and a mom, and a friend, and just being your awesome, lovely self?
Sara: Thank you, that's a great question! Number one, I don't do elf on the shelf.
Jen: Cut yourself free of that.
Sara: This is a hard line. No, that's a joke.
Jen: Once you start it, no going back.
Sara: We don't mess with that business.
Jen: That is priceless.
Sara: One of my sweet neighbors at one point gave me an elf on the shelf, and I said, "No, thank you."
Jen: Thank you!
Sara: Thank you! Thank you! So brilliant! No, that's a joke. But honestly, if I could go back, if I could go back, don't mess with elf on the shelf. I would say I've got a great partner. He has always uplifted me in my career. He's always supported me in what we're doing. He is there for all of it. And he has an incredible career himself. I'm so proud of him. But he's never made me feel like my ambitions are any less than his. So just, he's always been there. I mean, the nature of an actor is that your schedule is really random. So I'll be here for a chunk of time. And then this year I missed my daughter's birthday party because we were filming on my daughter's birthday party of all days. Right. So he's like, "I got this, don't worry."
Jen: You're a great team.
Sara: Yeah, we're a great team. And I think that that's it. It's that balance of someone who's gonna like cheer you on. And also knowing that there's enough studies that say, you know, the children of working moms have a lot of achievement in their own lives because they see that.
Brian: Mm-hmm.
Sara: And I think it's important for them to know that I get to work. Like I try and use language like that. I'm so excited I get to work. This makes me a better mom. Mm-hmm. And then on the flip side, they make me a better actor. When I became a parent, it opened up just a well inside of me that I didn't have access to before.
And so I give them a lot of credit for that and for also keeping everything in perspective. It's hard to— I think as an actor, you can get really insular and focused, and being a parent gives context to everything. There's so much more. This, like, this is important, but there's also so much else out there to focus on. Your kids fuel you in that way that I'm very thankful for.
Brian: Oh, absolutely. And yeah, kids help give you that perspective and give you that passion and purpose to do what you do.
Jen: Yeah, they give you humility too.
Brian: Oh yeah, exactly, for sure. Well, Sarah, this has been incredible. I know we've been wanting to get you in the podcast here.
Sara: What a treat!
Brian: Yes, this has been so much fun and, you know, such great information. I think, you know, regardless of whether you're, you know, interested in pursuing acting or not, I think there's so many great takeaways here. So thank you for being on. And, thank you, Jen!
Sara: Thank you so much!
Brian: And that's a wrap for today's episode of the Grit.org Podcast. We'll see you guys next time.
Take care!
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